Thursday, May 19

Galatians 5:22-23

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

Colossians 3:12-14

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against each other. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

A number of years ago I flew to Ohio to share in my father’s 65th birthday celebration. We had a big party for him on Saturday night; I spoke at his church on Sunday morning, and we had a big family dinner afterwards. It was a great time! My return flight to Chicago was at 3:50 in the afternoon – and I had scheduled that time very intentionally so I could get back home in time to see my own family before the boys went to bed so I could give them the surprise I promised them (which I often did whenever I traveled). So, after our family dinner I asked my Dad, “My flight is at 3:50 – how long does it take to get to the airport from here?” Without hesitation he said, “Forty minutes.”


Now, when my Dad said, “Forty minutes,” I believed him. I had no reason not to. After all, this was the same man who, to my knowledge, had never intentionally misled me, and had been a pillar of truth and wisdom my whole life. He is as utterly dependable as any man I have ever known, so when he said “forty minutes” – I trusted him.


So I added 20-25 minutes to that 40 – counted backward from 3:50 and said, “So, let’s leave your house about 2:45 then – that will give us plenty of time.” I was thinking that this time frame would allow me maximum time with my Mom and Dad before heading to the airport in time to catch my flight without too much hurry. “Forty minutes,” he had said.


We left at 2:45 pm sharp and after 55 minutes driving 60 MPH we saw the first sign for the Cleveland airport, which said, “Airport 5 miles.” My Dad asked, “What time is your flight again?” I said, with a clipped tone, “3:50 Dad, my flight is at 3:50.” He replied, “Well, the flight will probably be late – you’ll be fine.” At that moment, whatever “Fruit of the Spirit” I had growing in the greenhouse of my heart began to wilt – badly.


As I recall, the first to go was patience. I began looking at my watch every 30 seconds or so and saying helpful things like, “It’s 3:41 Dad.” Or, “We’re not going to make it.” The second to go was peace; then joy, and so on right down the list.


We rolled up to “departures” at 3:47 and I leapt out of the car.  But before shutting the door I said, “Happy birthday Dad, thanks for the ride, and just for the record – it takes you an hour and five minutes to get to the airport!”


Even though I sprinted through the airport like O.J. Simpson (O.K. – bad analogy), I missed my flight. I sat in the airport for the next four hours stewing over how it could be that my Dad didn’t know how long it took to get to the airport. When I finally straggled home around 11:00 pm, I realized that in all my frustration and self-pity I had forgotten to get my boys the treat I had promised. Faithfulness, it turns out, was the last of the fruit to bite the dust!


It seems to me that sometimes the fruit of the Spirit can be most difficult at home with the people we know best and love most. Why is that so? First, it’s difficult because they are the people we are around the most – and therefore we see each other at both our best and our worst. Second, I think we tend to expect more from our family than we do everyone else. And when we expect more we are more easily disappointed and/or hurt. Finally, I think we tend to assume that things like love, joy and peace should happen kind of “automatically” at home – without much effort – because, after all, we are family!


The truth is that very often home is the most difficult place to live out the “fruit of the Spirit” It is also true that home is, by far, the most important place to grow fruit! Ask God to help you identify which of the fruit Paul mentions is most lacking in your home – and ask him to add some fertilizer to your heart!

 Brian Coffey