Tuesday, February 22

Luke 15:25-30

“Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’

“The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. But he answered his father, ‘Look, all these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours, who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!”

Years ago, when I was still in my seminary training, I gave a short devotional to a group of seminary students from different denominational traditions. We were part of a CPE (Clinical Pastoral Education) training group serving for a semester as chaplains at a large suburban hospital. Once a week or so we took turns sharing a devotional thought with the group. When it was my turn, I used a quote from a book I had been reading that I thought reminded me that while I was called by God to serve others in ministry – I was still a sinner in need of grace like those I served. So I read the following quote:

“I am a part –time novelist who happens also to be a part-time Christian because part of the time seems to be the most I can manage to live out my faith…From time to time I find a kind of heroism momentarily possible – a seeing, doing, telling of Christly truth – but most of the time I an indistinguishable from the rest of the herd that jostles and snuffles at the great trough of life. Part time novelist, Christian, pig.” (Frederick Buechner, “The Alphabet of Grace”)

I followed this quote with Paul’s words in 1 Timothy 1:15-16:

“Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners – of who I am the worst. But for that very reasons I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those how would believe on him and receive eternal life.”

My main point was that, as those who have been called to ministry, we – above all others – must remain deeply aware of our dependence on the grace and forgiveness of Christ!

Our devotional time was always followed by a time of feedback – usually relentlessly positive – offered to the student who had given the devotional. The feedback I received wasn’t very, uh, pleasant! The group was angry – no, furious with me! “How dare you,” said one woman in a voice quivering with outrage, “how dare you insinuate that I am a sinner! I have dedicated my life to helping others – I’ve never been so insulted!” And it wasn’t just her – one after the other each person in the group – including the supervisor – objected to what they saw as my “inappropriate assumption” about someone else’s sinfulness.

I tried to explain that it wasn’t really my idea – that this was the Apostle Paul talking about the very heart of the gospel – but to no avail. They were mad at me and they stayed mad at me.

Now, looking back, I think two things were going on there. First, the choice of the quote that used the word “pig” as an illustration probably wasn’t the best choice – given that the group was comprised mostly of women! But second, I think the group was comprised of a bunch of “older brothers” – that is, people who had become convinced of their own goodness and moral superiority. I think they may have reacted so strongly because I had suggested that, deep down, we are all were selfish and prideful and sinful, and in need of God’s grace.

The older brother in Jesus’ story believed that his father owed him something. He believed that he deserved better than his younger brother because he was better! He resented his father’s love and forgiveness for his brother because he had never really received it himself. He didn’t want to be loved; he didn’t want to be forgiven – he wanted to be paid what he thought he was worth.

And there’s the heart of the older brother’s sin. Deep down he believes he deserves God’s blessing and therefore he cannot bring himself to receive it as a gift of the father’s love.

May we – younger and older brothers alike – always be humble enough to be aware of our own sinful and selfish nature so that we may always be aware of the astonishing grace of God through Jesus Christ. For only as we marvel at his grace can we actually share it with others. 

Brian Coffey